Sunday, September 21, 2008

This one comes highly recommended, I laughed out loud on nearly every page...some examples:

"Everyone drank too much coffee too, at the wrong times and for the wrong reasons. They drank it when they came in every morning to get going, and then again in the afternoon to keep going. They ran on caffeine fumes all day and never fucking got anywhere. Then they went home spent and empty and crashed in front of the TV every night and slept away the few hours they had for themselves. All these motherfuckers are always talking about the best ways to manage your time. The fact is any time spent at work not sleeping in the bathroom is wasted time."
"The boss's name was Andrew, but he didn't like the term boss. He referred to himself as the team faciliator. He was blond and slight and soft-voiced, with that managerial style where you speak quietly and ask your employees to do things, prefacing every request with "Could you do me a favor?" or "If you have time..." or "Whenever you have a moment..." and ending with "At your earliest convenience, of course." It's the kind of schtick where if you're a parent who tries it on their kids they grow up to be crack whores and gang-related murder statistics with no respect for anything. But it works on defeated adults because they don't have the backbone to say "Fuck you Dad" and make the obviously wrong decision."

--Cool Hand Mo

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